i worked my ass off today, pretty happy bout it tho. but i still have not work on my room that pretty much looks like a zoo at the moment. i've been cooking much lately, since that is the only thing i feel like doing instead of cleaning. i hate cleaning. srsly, i just can't imagine living alone, haha. anyways, i dont feel like going out today, maybe i do. but i need to keep my mum company.

i just bought a red box with hearty pattern on it. shiny even. looks valentine-ish but i dont care, it has some cool components. which i think is cool, you may not. you may even think i'm such a fool for buying that box that was pretty pricey.

i want another watch. i'm so addicted.

karma >.< i now love wearing leggings for sleeping.

ugh mom attacks, she wants a beauty treatment for me. so lazeh. i hate going to salon these days. its so... time-consuming.

you know what: I NEED SOME FREGGIN GOOD TV SHOWS. dumb channels.


i'm watching joan cusack checking out come cheese. stupid. youtube is so lame right now. i dont feel like going youtube. ciao.

i feel bad for people i've stalked before thru the net >.< like srsly. but its fuuuuuuuun, i recommend people to try it. you might get some unexpected infos.

i adore CERN, for inventing the world wide web. you science ppl are geniuses (no pun intended).

i dont give a damn on those time-and-energy-consuming bullshits about how internet changed the world in a bad way and things like that. you know what, internet plays a big part of your life, and you can not deny that it does make a change in whichever part of your brain.... in one way or another. you might live without internet, but it is beneficial you cannot resist. despite the fact that crimes and porn whatever comes in handy across the network but srsly guys, i mean sometimes we're the one who has to make an effort not to check it out, right?

by the way, i've been driving myself to movies again lately, although i didn't go to the movies much but i do buy vcds and (illegal) dvds. haha poor me. i just loooove to call it illegal, not that i wanna act all bad, but it's fun being descriptive haha. there's a huge difference between dvds, and illegal dvds. dvds or original dvds cost a fortune while illegal dvds only take probbly... say... 4% of one original dvd. i'm not blaming anyone or my friends of saying dvd but its just my point of view. and i just learned that lately, so never mind if i said dvds before. haha besides, i learn one thing from andrew last weekend:

appreciate and respect every point of view. Thanks fella!

anyways, lets go back to my point, i've been watching a lot of indonesian movies. not that i wanna make fun of the bad ones and embrace the good ones only. but i want to compare and reflect (ceileeeeh) how the film industry in indonesia is growing. but... idk how to say this. because as it grows, there are a lot of movies that keeps.. ok, let me put it this way.. there are 3 movies. movie A, if you promote the film in.. say.. paris film festival, it would make a big hit. but for movies B & C, not only that people wouldnt even try to get in the cinema, but it would also downgrade indonesia in the film industry. so it is a hard work. but good movies are coming our way lately, but it didn't violate the presence of movies which are supposedly not to be shown in our country for whatever reason. its just wrooong.

i hate that i lost my gie vcd >.< where did i put it ya? i was tryna buy chants of lotus the other day, but im glad i didnt buy it cus i seem to have lack of money that day haha. i'm gonna buy it soon. so excited. heheeee.

oyea, by the way. laskar pelangi wasn't as good as the book. srsly. i was hoping for more. they turn things around, and i was shocked.



i gtg help my mum. see ya.

now i'm here, sitting, elaborating my laziness. gosh, i hate being lazy. not that i don't wanna have fun, but i need to do my duties.

duties. gosh it haunts me night and day. now i'm home alone. well not exactly alone, but ... yeah u can call it alone. *nothing to say* ok. been watching some tv shows, and i have to say... gossip girl is going too inappropriate. it was fine before, but now. its a no no. idk if you guys agree but for me, its overly adult-ic (or however you wanna put it). i would rather watch ugly betty than gossip girl. besides, scandals can sometimes bore you. IT BORES YOU BAAAD.

and heroes, i can go maddddddaaaahh. gosh mohinder suresh is such a sick bastard x( i hate him like... like... damn.

HOLY CRAP
i really need to go to the beach... something like... water would do.

been pigging out in my room lately, with cookies. movies, music, and what not. i've been a wreck since after ramadhan. i cant found myself some peace of mind. and god knows why. well, i do to. i must interfere with nature, no matter how. and by this i did not mean talking to animals like a sick lunatic.

of which i'm beginning to discover if i'm acting like one. scaryxzx.

talking on skype with sari for... quiet a long while. and she was HYPED about having skype. she couldnt get over it.




i need water. sea water. i need to go to greece. oasis would be fine. not that imma swim in it. nvm, ciaoooooista.

ok i'm so consumptive >.< this month i've reached twice my limit omg help. gotta save some moneeeyy.

SELAMAT HARI RAYA!

ok got this message for sarriee: SAR, CHECK OUT AJ'S NEW VIDEO. ITS A NEW SONG HE MADE, GOSH IT WAS GODAWESOME! AND YOU KNOW WHAT, THE LYRIC WAS ABOUT LYDIA! omg omg omg, awwwwwnesssss.

i (illegally) downloaded the video from youtube hahas =)

so far, my holiday was okay. nothing's special except for lebaran, had a lot of fun fighting with my little monsters. i was a pillow that day, they whipped me with plastic chocolate jars. and went thru my bag. opened my wallet. spread my money bills all over the bed. played with my oh-so-low-bat phone. put out all the cds i brought. GOSH WHEN CAN THEY STOP. uh, i know : when they grow up. in around... 10 years time.

oh, and they played soccer pillow balls. guess the target : my head.


kill me.

this is like the cutest thing ever. i'm reading a kadohata novel, and found this. A girl was talking to her little brother who was carrying a stick

"Did you hit anyone?"

"No, because nobody hit you"


awwness

i'm so sick of my blog sometimes

you're a golden ocean on a shore of bright white sand





in a complicated world you bring simplicity









i'll wait till forever is through..

i miss you :'( whichever you are. haha.

a very very good friend of mine is an ocean away. one, idk where.

it's holiday, and i hate it. i just wanna get it overwith and come back to school


i went to sayap ibu yesterday, and frankly saying, i love my trip. i fell in love with the kids.

nandra's asleep, she was staying over.






i hate that i love your favorite song >.<

rooster rocks my day. these lyrics are sooo deep. been having the cd for a few years now, just noticed how beautiful it was written.


Does it help if i say
That im really truly sorry
And that I never meant for it to end- this way
Theres a place in your heart
Where you know you'll always find me
and I'll be with you wherever you are
Near or far

Oh so if you believe
Say a prayer for me
I wont be here tomorrow
Somewhere I gotta be
Things you want to say
Save them for another day
Cos i can hear the angels calling
Angels calling for me



that is super saaaaaad T.T

KEMBANG NESTAPA


mawar mekar semekar-mekarnya
juga duri yang menghiasi tangkai memanjang
menggores, berzina dengan darah manusia
lalu bercampur dengan kelopak yang selaras
dan kami pun berdansa.

namun saat ini.

melati kian lama kian hilang
kelopak kecilnya sudah tua dan mencoklat
lebah tak inginkan lagi
kupu pun mati beku di dinding rumah ini.




filza, dan sendok kue kecil.

this is what keeps filza and anya's tie (whatever ties we have now) alive:

filza: ... not that i care..
anya: (hugs me) you do care..

filza: he's a person too..
anya: a jerk
filza: that would make you a jerk too know why
filza: cus u're acting like one

anya: wrong convo, genius

filza: what you did is wrong too
anya: i know
anya: umm...i'm not gonna apologize?
filza: r u shameless?
anya: no i dont think what i did is wrong
filza: but you just said i know.

anya: LOLOLOLOL
filza: HAHAHHAHAHA

(i meant laughter -.-)

filza: SUMPAH DOTA ABIS MUKANYA

anya: aah get me a crush
anya: i wanna live crushless, pls

(huh?)

anya: OMG BEBI ITU HOMO ABIS HELP HELP
filza: HOMO BANGET KAN GILA BEBI HELP HELP

anya: CAN GO DIE LARH

anya: dia tuh metrosex xcore

anya: METROSEX HXC

anya: METROSEX TO THE FREAKING CORE.

haha we like to talk about metrosex people. they're... interesting.... (sarcastically)

anya: that ugly fuckshitcock

filza: you did? what you fuckheadcrazybitchass-punk who didnt invite me
anya: omg u can swear

anya: okay
anya: okay
anya: okay
anya: FUCK MAN
filza: ANYA PLS DONT SWEAR
anya: ok sorry




our days were pweeteeeh. I LOVE YOU ANYA.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY BABY SEKARSARI :)

you're 16 now!

you look awesome last night
glad that you were super shocked and happy at the surprise :)
we're super happy that you looove our present.

walaupun mesti ngalah sama almer buat ngucapin ulang tahun -__-
12.02 (yaudah, ngalah semenit)

happy birthday sayang :)

TERM TESTS ARE OVAAAAHH!

although i'm still concerned.

1. the grades
2. the grades
3. the grades
4. the semester exaaaaaaaaaam!


frikkin shithead if this is term, what's for semester?

from there on i can conclude that
(i just read naida's blog haha)


I WANT MY GRADE 10 BACK!

I suck, nearly in everything i do.

i am so down right now, hopeless. business is just driving me crazy.


i regret not spending my free time to study. and i also regret not taking economy in the first place.

redha, if u read this please dont tell mom and dad. and pray for me please.


i can't do this. i dont have the urge to learn. but i learn from my mistakes. please forgive me pa, just this once. promise i'll fix it.

i dont like this subject at all, i just hope that binus can afford some subjects like history or geography.






i wanna cry >.<

ok, i take back my words. sara b is pretty good. easy listening especially when youre in the car waiting to buy josh groban's huhuu.

i like the songs i hated. and now i regret hating it. haha

i just realize.



i need josh groban's new cd to be inside my car. need. need. need.

it's been long since i replay so she dances all the time and just now it came out on the radio. and i felt a sense of satisfaction in the middle of my stress-insanity (does that even exist?lol).

i need this.

so she dances. always been my favorite.

i'm in loooooove with a song. i replay every 5 minutes. since i know i'm not gonna be able to listen any day next week. it's on youtube :( not available on limewire.

anyways, sariiii! aj rafael punya blog loh, ternyata dia temenan sama my fav myspace musician haha senang deh.

2nd anyways, TERM TEST. shoot man, business is leyzeh. bio needs a deeper dig. English is ... hard. Math is... practice. ITGS is ... okay. just a waste of time. Bahasa is... scary >.< TOK : A WASTE. i just hate it.

i spent 2 hours stalking someone, along with anya. its completely shocking. i cant stop putting a sad emoticon on msn.

i need CAS hours. i'll beg mr.linus to extend the ACP time. hehe.

i'm still sad :( 2 days of sorrow. man, i cant blv i feel so mad if i see that face.


i cant get over it, ces.

thanks zack, for everything... really.



i miss you. and i dont want you to be sorry, it's all my fault i was so stupid. i'm feeling too emotional now, but at least i can handle it.

127 hours 57 minutes till ...







trembles, shakes, and furrowed brows.